The only place on this earth, where you can step into work and can crib about not having slept properly is a BPO, and the best part is that you could do it everyday. Drowsiness, indigestion, dark circles and an accent that would make you look like a refrigerator inside an Igloo is what you would earn initially working in a contact center. The ads of most of these companies will have trekkers perched against K2, or a team doing white water rafting fighting all the odds, with captions provoking the young " Do you have it in you", " Define your Success" etc. If any of these models work in tech support projects for North America, leave a camera, they would lose confidence to stand in front of a mirror and introduce themselves.
The initial component of the job is fun, you would most probably meet an accent trainer, who's usually hot and is pro-American. Watching English movies and acting out plays, would make yo feel at college, the only difference being you are your own expense here. The round of fun is usually topped up with a boring process training, in which you will be taught on 100 ways of screwing a customer by not giving him what he wants. For example a policy that I learned working for a renowned computer seller states that an LCD cannot be exchanged till it has 5 dead pixels. That means even if you have three dead pixels at the center of the screen the customer has to live with it. How would the customer feel it if these pixels come in between the peak of a Sharon stone scene, all the customer can do is to cool off. There is an instance in which one of my colleagues had gone ahead and asked the customer to collect three more dead pixels i he was looking for a refund, I found the guy enjoying in communication training for two weeks thereafter.
The process training would ensure that you would use scripts written to perfection which in turn makes customer realize that it's humanly impossible to speak that way and demands for a human being to help him out. " Am I talking to a human being??, Could I talk to anything other than machine" are some common outcomes of using award winning scripts.So armed with thousand ways of grilling the customer, the trump card of those being the accent, we start the revenge against people who once ruled us. The pleasure of tormenting a Brit asking for help, pleading for a refund are experiences loads of Indians would love to be a part of even without a pay.
Experience on calls are extremely funny and would remain with you for a life time. Quoting some of the funniest :
Agent : Thank you for calling "xyz" tech support, how may I help you ??
Customer : Hey, I am an expert on mainframes and have been working on projects for CIA, FBI and top agencies. So please do not treat me like a dumb fellow American, just tell me what has to be done and I'll do it. So no hand holding, all right??
Agent: ( Who's dumbstruck, with popped out eyes) Yes,May I know the issue ??
Customer: Cannot go online, it says page cannot be displayed??
Agent: Could you give me the output of the ping command??
Customer: What would that be??
Agent: Could you open the command prompt??
Customer: How I do that??
Agent: Could you please right click on my computer??
Customer: I am a Lefty, how would I go about it??
Agent: You told me that you are techie ??
Customer: Why can't lefties be techies??
And the agent is convinced about the fact that it's not just his manager, there are customers who would behave the same way. So the job begins, the honeymoon is over and you start talking to wall street smarties to wild farmers. An accent seeps in which would never suit your appearance, short, dark, potbellied Asian with an American accent, how bad it could it get. R's are no longer straight, they are rolled with a rod roller, W is pronounced in an astonishingly funny way and last but not least pronouncing thank you demands your tongue to shoved up between the front sets of teeth. Dressing has to change, trousers and denim has to be worn with the intention that your but crack is visible when you take a seat, drop a pen or pick up a key chain. Smoking is a ritual, if you miss out on that you're missing out on information only nicotine could bring out. And slowly the kid from the middle class, takes on the bumpy ride to live the great American dream !!!!!
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